the weekend

Saturday morning I ended up taking Brayden to the pedi to get his ears checked. They are clear! He weighs 15lbs 11 ouces! While we were gone, Dad set up his High Chair. Not that he is gonna eat solids anytime soon.... but he loves to sit up and play. so we strapped him in, and give him some toys. He had a jolly time! We let him try out his exersaucer too. He wasnt so sure about that, but I am sure he will love it soon!

Chris and I went out on a date saturday night. We couldnt talk about poopy pants, daycare or spit up- that was the rules. We did well with the rules, and had a good time. Brayden had a good time with his grandma and grandpa, and Uncle Cal and Aunt Shel. He got Grandma good with spit up, the whole outfit! And Aunt RoHo got some really good giggles playing peek-a-boo. Chris and I had a blast yesterday listening to him giggle. He gets laughing and about about looses his breath, and his whole belly shakes. It is so entertaining.

Pokie Prince Grandpa

Grandpa passed away yesterday. I dont think he was in alot of pain for too long, that is what we hoped for anyway. The photo is from when we took Brayden to meet grandma and grandpa. Grandpa was still doing quite well, still his sassy self you could say. And Grandma seemed to know how we were, she rocked his car seat with her foot. I still think she looks funny without her teeth in! Grandpa never wore his teeth, he would have looked funny with them! I went to see grandpa one last time over easter weekend, and he was still himself inside- his stories and his sass..... but he was thin and could only whisper. He still ticked when he talked though. He always smacked his lips while talking, since I could remember!

Emily, Jeff, Craig and I called these grandparetns "pokie-prince grandma and grandpa". They had 2 dogs, Pokie and Prince. Grandpa calls me "sarah's boom-boom", from toddler, and embarassingly enough through my teen years and adult days too! I guess when I was a little one I made a "boom boom" sound when I fell. He was full of trucking stories, and was always talking about the indian under the rock by the house I grew up in.

They had a framed photo of the 2 of them at the nursing home. It was from thier prom night, and they both looked beautiful. Grandpa pointed it out to me both times I went there, and he made sure everyone saw it. He really liked that photo of the two of them. I think he is in Heaven in his prom suit, young, healthy and cancer free; waiting for grandma to join him. That is the image I have in my head.

last free weekend

This is where life starts to get less fun. I was really bumming yesterday, probably because I know what happens next week. I start working 10 hour days. Next week 5 of them... and after that 6 of them a week. Believe it or not, this IS reducing my spring hours in comparison to previous years.

Its gonna be hard! I am honestly scared I am gonna have a nervous breakdown. I am still gonna make time to see my therepist though. I know what is gonna suffer... me time. I will have no down time until after memorial day weekend. I havnt really had any me time for a few months now either. I don't even know what I would do if I got a free day for me. Doesn't matter..... not gonna happen for awhile anyway!

This is my last weekend off till probably July. Until then I will just have ~wednesdays~ off work. So this weekend we have some plans to enjoy it. Chris and I are gonna go on a date. And I hope to play with Brayden a lot too.

so strange

It has been years since I have experienced the death of a family member. My grandparents (mom's parents) are both in the nursing home. Grandpa doesnt have long at all to live (if living is what we can call his currant existance). He is going down hill fast- cancer. And Grandma has no idea about anything. She has alzhiemers (sp). There are not huggy, close people..... so visiting them this weekend, possibly for the last time, was very strange.

I dont know what my mom is feeling, but it has to be so hard to see both your parents like this. They have been going down hill fast for a long time. Now that the end is here, I am sure she is filled with all sorts of emotions.

Even in Grandma and Grandpa's current condition... it was still my grandparents. Grandma had no clue who anyone was, but I could see glimmers of her personality still. Grandpa was in bed, could hardly talk or move, but it was still him talking to me.

Happy late Easter!

It was Brayden's first easter this year! He pretty much slept thru it. We went up to my parents for the weekend. It was nice seeing everyone again, and showing them how big he got!

Last year was a special easter too, the thursday before we found out we were pregnant!

I got a decent photo of me with my boy too. Wanted one of the family, but either dad or I were making a bad face. Maybe next time! Of course I shot some more of just the cutie pie. Below is just one of him with his bad habit.

We cant wait till Brayden is older and we can crack eggs with him. That is a tradition that my family does each easter. We crack eggs with each other to see who has the champion egg! My family has been doing this as long as I can remember! We love to ~initiate~ the new members as our family grows.

my feet

I swear- my feet are longer then there were before! My shoes still dont fit right. I thought it was from the bloated feet that my shoes were tight. But my feet arent bloated anymore.....?????

As promised:

here is my little leprechan! He is sleeping in his swing, I could NOT have survived the last 3 months without this swing! It goes back and forth, and side to side. It plays music, and there is a mobile.... he loves his swing!

Top: Brayden after his long, stressful day at daycare with an ear infection.

Bottom: Brayden before daycare.

The roads are icey today, so I am working from home. The little man is at daycare. I have gotten so much work done without all the distractions of work (phone calls, co-worker questins, chat time with Cheri.....).

I am trying to come up with a new blog name to reflect what I think my life is these days. Something like "the working cow", that is in consideration. I blog so much about pumping and breastfeeding, and my milk supply consumes so much of my mind (I dont want to ever be short!). Very soon I will be working obscene hours for a new mommy, and I plan to try my hardest to keep up the pumping and bf'ing. I may have to rely on my frozen stash of milk, which isnt so bad- Chris is getting mad that I have completely taken over the storage freezer.

pedi update

Dr. L. prescribed a new medicine for his ear infections. Soemthing stronger. Said if not better in 48 hours to come see him. Lets hope this baby boy feels better soon.

daycare update

I called daycare again (for the 4th time today!). He was eating nicely, and was falling asleep. He has calmed down nicely. I told them to put him in his car seat instread of laying down- he sleeps nicely in there and really needs a good nap today. Whew. He crys so little, that something must really be wrong for him to cry all morning.

Happy St. patricks day!

My little lephrechan is wearing all green! He is so cute, as usual. I will have to post his picture sometime.

What a morning! I changed my clothes alot, even my socks! He really showered me with pee. It has been ages since his cannon shot all over the nursery. Mom should know better!

He isnt have a good mornng at daycare. He was doing so well yesterday, I thought he had this ear infection pretty well knicked. He has been crying alot this morning, and isnt eating well. I am waiting for his pedi to call, but I think I am going to leave early and try to comfort him.

first ear infection

both ears too! Poor little man. I am impressed that he is still quite smiley and cheery for how bad he feels. I hope the medicine starts to work really soon.

He weighed 14lbs 11 oz! He was in his clothes and diaper though....

Brayden at 10 weeks

How can you not smile when he grins like this?

he helped! what a difference!

Yesterday morning I blew up at Chris. I asked him for help the night before and he said he would take care of those things the next morning. Well he didnt, and it left me scrambling and hungry! I got home frm work and Chris was thinking ahead! Brayden was ok in his crib, so he caught a quick shower so he wouldnt have to do that in the morning. He did some laundry, sorted the mail, and started thinking about dinner. It all helped! Last night went well.

This morning, smiley woke at 4:30 cooing in his crib. So I fed him, and put him back in his crib to play. I packed lunches, my pump and ate breakfast. At 5:30 I decided I wanted a shower, so I woke chris and told him I put a moniter next to him to listen for baby while I showered. When I got out, Chris was actually awake! I was impressed. He got ready for work, then changed Brady's clothes while I loaded my car and FIXED MY HAIR! yeah, that's big. It was such a nice morning, and I feel good for once. I dont feel so frazzeled.

little ~freetime~

it seems my free time to go online and play around (and blog!) is while I am getting the milk at work. Thank god I have figured out how to go hands free, I can relax much more instead of being bored to death hanging onto my pumping peices. It is so crazy for me at home. I only have time to take care of Brayden, help with dinner and dishes, get more milk, and prepare for the next day. If I had anymore time I would use it to sleep some more. I am so exhausted! Thank god Brayden isnt effected by the one cup of coffee I have added to my diet. I would be sleeping on the job without that one little cup of java!

I really dont know how I am going to work my high demand job this spring without dying of pure exhaustion. Currantly I leave for work at 7am, and return home at 6pm. I sleep from 9pm-5am. That doesnt give me much time to do everything I need to do at home to take care the currant day and think of the next. Spring I work 6 days a week, and 5 of them are 10 hour days, 1 day is 8 hours. Guess I can only try, and if a change needs to be made- then so be it.

is this my life?

My life is so different then it has ever been, I am so different too. I never imagined I would be one to do the breastfeeding working mom thing..... but Brady is doing so well on breastmilk that I hate to change that right now. My mind is so consumed by my milk supply. LOL. Crazy!!! Working with so many men, and washing up my pumping supplies- LMAO! The looks they give while looking at the parts and peices, priceless!

I always said I needed at least 7 hours of uninterupted sleep to survive. Nope, I dont. While I do say I can hardly survive or even like myself unless I get at least 3.5 hours of straight uninterupted sleep at some point in the night. I can deal with 6 hours of broken sleep if I have too... just let me have at least a 3.5 hour stretch in there please! Those nights of waking every 1-2 hours made me a zombie! Dont get me wrong, I would 1 nice night of sleep.... dream come true!

I really dont care that my floor has only been washed once since Brayden was born. Just dont get enough sleep to find the time to care about that yet! We can get the dishes and laundry done easily.... and counters, sinks and toilets are easy enough for us to keep clean too. Just that dang floor!

I never thought I would feel this good about taking my child to daycare! He is doing so incredibly well there. They love him, he is loving them... kids and adults! He fell perfectly into his own routine. He eats and sleeps about the same times both there and at home. They spend more time playing with him and providing stimulation then I can.... they are 100% there for the kids... they dont have to worry about the dishes, laundry and dirty sinks. He enjoys the other children interacting with him too. They love to bring him toys. He is the only baby there, that makes me feel good too.

why cant he multi-task?

Things are a bit overwhelming right now! But I am focusin on the good and taking things day by day. The first week back to work cant go ~great~, now can it? The night before lunches are made, clothes are put out and dinner is planned.

Yesterday morning we did a good job getting out the door on time. I was exhausted becuase Brayden woke ever 1-2 hours all night long! Dad arrived home from daycare at 3:45 and Brayden was sound asleep in his car seat. I got home at 6 and he was still sleeping. Dad just watched TV this whole time! He didnt start dinner, do the laundry, or make the lunches.... he watched TV. I got home, had to ~get the milk~ again, and wash the pumping stuff and bottles- in no time was 7pm. We woke brayden and dad fed him. I prepared lunches and took care of everything else to make tomorrow go smoothly. At 8:30 brayden wanted to eat again, and he fell back asleep after that feeding. I was SO EXHAUSTED, between my cold and lack of sleep I prayed so hard for a good nights sleep. Brayden only waked once to nurse, and then once more an hour later to be rocked back to sleep.

Well, this morning, it all started over again. I woke to an exploding boob as it had not been emptied ofr over 8 hours! So I started pumping. TMI WARNING! TMI! Just as the milk started flowing Brayden woke to eat. But I could not stop pumping because I was spraying milk all over! Dad woke, and brought brayden to me- so I asked him to change his diaper, I needed 3 more minutes. By then the pressure was off and I wasnt spraying anymore. I fed him (dad went back to sleep of course!) and went back to finish pumping my still full boobs. But this time while I pumped I ate breakfast and changed braydens outfit. This is doable, but will take some planning to have everything near by as I can only go as far as my 3' tubes allow me! I still could not get out the door! Dad has been waking 20-30 minutes earlier then usual, but it seems he is taking more time showering and getting ready and really isnt that much help in the morning.

I wish dad's could multitask! He never has been able to, and there is no changing him now! But I do need to sit down and talk to him about how he can help out a bit more before I get really mad.... or die from exhaustion. I dont think that I am asking too much of him.... that if he doesnt want to wake and help in the morning that he helps with things in the evening. Watching 3 hours of tv everynight just isnt gonna happen anymore!

Boobs are impressive! I pumped 32 ounces yesterday! And I fed him before work, after and during the night. wow! this handsfree pumping is working out nicely for me too. I am much happier.

the pressure

Ouch! I had a running nose yesterday and today I have a ton of sinus pressure and my ears hurt. Dang it! I had not been sick at all this winter. BRayden might have a snotty nose too. He is still fussier then normal too, has been since his shots tuesday.